What to Wear to a Funeral

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Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Funeral Outfits for All Ages

Quote of the day: “It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.” J.K. Rowling

I picked this quote because I think at the age we are at now, we probably realize that life is too short. It’s too short for many insignificant things, including forgetting to live. I’m sure this can mean a lot of different things to many different people. But to me, one of the things this means, is trying to enjoy every day! Concentrate on the positive, not the negative!

We are teaming up with Cathy from My Side of 50 to show some ideas for what we wear to funerals. This may be considered a somber event for most of us. But, I also wrote a post on why I like funerals earlier this week! And Cathy joined in with a post showing a checklist on practical ways to help when someone dies.

And since this event is something most of us will need to attend at some point in our lives, we might as well be ready for it. In fact, I was just visiting a friend in Phoenix, who takes a “funeral outfit” with her when they go on their extended trips—just in case!

And not to be flippant—but one of the most important things to wear to this event is waterproof mascara. Even when I’ve been at funerals where I didn’t know the deceased that well, it’s inevitable that there will be tears. As for the clothing, I know most of us will choose a black dress or black outfit, but I do think that other colors can be just as appropriate! You tell me, what do you wear?

Cathy (My Side of 50): I don’t want to spoil the surprise of what all Cathy is wearing so I’m only showing the top half here! You should visit her site to get all of the details. But I love that she wore a white, crochet jacket that she had bought for a cruise last summer. And it’s funny how she tells the story how she ended up “shopping her closet” for this outfit. I do think that many times we “forget” what we have in that wardrobe of ours!

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Jodie’s (50’s) Outfit: I was the last of the 3 of us to have my photos taken for this post, so I chose my navy dress, in order to give some variety to the mix.

My dress is a sweater dress from Charming Charlies, and taking these photos, made me realize that I should wear a full slip under it, maybe like this one here! I think I’ve worn it in the past with a jacket or cardigan over it, but I never realized how you can sometimes see through it.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

As much as I want to be respectful for the family of the deceased, I also feel strange wearing all black because that’s not me.

That’s why I chose this necklace because it seemed to add a little bit of life to the look. However, my husband wondered if it was too colorful or ornate for a funeral? In my opinion it seems fine, but I’m interested to see what you think!

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

I wanted to wear flats for this look because I know there are times, when you will also visit the cemetery after the service, and it’s not always easy to walk on the grass in heels!

As many funerals as I’ve been to, I still can’t remember if I know ahead of time, if we’ll be going out to the cemetery. I suppose I could be smart enough to just bring a change of shoes with me to this event. Then I could wear my heels, yet have flats in the car, just in case. I’m glad we had this discussion, so now maybe I’ll think of this the next time!

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Dress: Charming Charlies (similar here)~~Shoes: Qupid (similar here with stripes or here in all white)~~Necklace: (similar here)~~Earrings: (similar here)

Nancy’s (60’s) Outfit: Nancy had just recently attended a funeral, so we had her put on what she had worn to the event. I was glad to see that she chose her grey outfit instead of something black.

Although,I realize that you are not looking to stand out at this kind of service, I thought this combination of colors was nice. I consider it subdued enough to look respectful. What do you think?

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

She kept her shoes in the same neutral color of grey.

In these photos, the shoes look like a different grey than the skirt & jacket, but I can tell you in person, they looked much closer to each other.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

The accessories she wore were small & understated with just a small chain for her necklace and button earrings for her ears.

I know I never really leave the house without some accessories adorning my body. But I could see how some people might feel that a funeral service is not meant for bling and extras. How do you feel about accessories at a funeral? Are they okay or too much?

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Nancy had chosen this top to wear under the “suit” to lighten it up a little.

I thought the necklines of both were very complimentary since they follow the same lines. In fact, this shirt has been in Nancy’s closet for a long time, yet the cross front blouses are quite in style these days. As my mother always says, “styles come back around!”

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Skirt: Weekenders (similar here in a floral or here in a sweater material)~~Cardigan: Weekenders (similar here)~~Top: Cable & Gauge (similar here)~~Shoes: Me Too (similar here)~~Necklace: (similar here)~~Earrings: (similar here)

Charlotte’s (70’s) Outfit: My mom had just been to a funeral too, so this was easy to recreate.

I guess it illustrates the point I was trying to portray in my last post, that as we get older, these events will become more and more common. Since it was the end of February, my mom piled on the boots and jacket. Of course, since it’s starting to warm up for most of us now, grabbing a pair of black pumps. like these, could be just as useful.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

This was all her own styling for this outfit (with the exception that she didn’t put on tights for these photos like she did for the actual funeral).

She wore her black & white, long sleeve, silk blouse under the blazer and small black earrings. I really like the fact that my mom wore a print shirt under her jacket. To me, it seems to break up the darkness of the overall outfit.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

As you’ve heard me say many times, my mom has quite the collection of brooches.

This art deco pin looks perfect on her blazer lapel. Not too ornate in my opinion, yet it ties in nicely with the print blouse.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Style & Fashion for the Mature Woman.

Skirt: Norton McNaughton (similar here)~~Blazer: Liz Sport (similar here under $100)~~Top: Paul Alexander (similar here in a ikat print or here as a lace up blouse)~~Boots: Bandolino (similar here)~~Pin: (similar here now there’s an investment piece—I bet mom didn’t pay anything near that amount for hers!)~~Earrings: (similar here)

Thanks to everyone reading this! I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your support!

There are affiliate links in this post. What this means is that when you click on a linked item, I receive a couple of cents. Those couple of cents can certainly add up! So I appreciate it if you keep clicking to help support Jodie’s Touch of Style!

Keeping in Touch

Are you registered for my email reminders to let you know when a post goes live? I’d certainly love it if you take the time to sign up and make sure all your friends sign up too!! There are other ways to follow my blog. Facebook readers can see my posts by liking my page. Or my Pinterest page has all of our outfits in a nutshell! 

And if you’re new to the party, you can always see our outfits organized by categories, here! Don’t forget to check out the deals & discounts too, on this page!

I rounded up some darker dresses that would be not only appropriate for a funeral, but other occasions too! You know by now, how I love to make our clothing versatile!

  • Jodie, this is such a great post and a really good idea. I cannot even tell you how many times I have had to do last minute shopping for a funeral outfit. It is really quite distressing. But now I have an arsenal of appropriate outfits to wear so I don’t have to shop in that situation. I remember when my mother passed away, I was visiting from about 1 1 /2 hours away. She was in the hospital but as far as I knew she would be just fine. Then she took a turn for the worst and passed a few days later. The doctors instructed not to go back home, so I had to go out buy a funeral outfit for myself. Even more distressing, I had to buy an outfit for my mother to be buried in as she had lost over half of her body weight during her illness and there was nothing that would fit. I remember the look on the salesperson’s face in Talbots after she helped me choose an appropriate funeral outfit and then I said,” Now we need an outfit for my mother.” I am chuckling about now these many years later! Anyway, one thing I like to wear to funerals is something in the person’s favorite color or pattern if I know what that is. For example, my husband’s grandmother loved butterflies and purple was her favorite color. So I chose a purple cardigan with an abstract butterfly print and layered it over an all black outfit.

    Sorry for the super long comment! This post really struck a chord! Thanks for sharing and linking up.

    Shelbee
    http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I think what you said is so true Shelbee. Not that shopping is bad, but really it’s the last thing you want to even think about at these times. That kinda happened to me when we flew out to see my MIL many years ago. We knew she wasn’t doing well, so at least we had some funeral appropriate clothes. But the events took longer than we had planned, so I ended up having to go buy some more undies. And do you realize that I still think of Rob’s mom’s funeral when I pull them out? Crazy!
      I just love the idea of wearing the deceased favorite colors or pattern—I would never have thought about that before posting this—that’s why I love blogging. The ideas from others are so thought provoking!!
      Thanks again for featuring me, Shelbee. I wasn’t even sure if this kind of post was appropriate when I first came up with the idea…

  • I tend to wear a darker color, although not black, to funerals. All of you look lovely and very appropriate.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Lana!

  • You all look elegant and respectful. Funerals are reminders that life on earth is temporary and to cherish the moments we have with each other. I know, because my brother was killed in a horrific car accident when he was 18. God comforts me with assurance and I believe in the message of Christmas and Easter.

    ❤️carmen

    Johnny’s story …

    https://fashionableover50.wordpress.com/2011/12/01/dedicated-to-johnny-the-drummer-boy/

    • Jodie Filogomo

      You have expressed this perfectly Carmen—life as we know it is only temporary. And feeling blessed every day is something I strive for.
      Thanks for sharing your story—it touched me deeply.

  • Susan Harper

    All great outfits appropriate for a funeral. I used to dread going to them as well, but the last few I have attended (including those of my parents) have really been uplifting. It is so nice to hear the positive comments about someone who had been a part of your life from others who knew them. Closure is important.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      What a great way to put this Susan. And that’s exactly how I usually feel—uplifted and glad to have been a part of their life!
      Thanks so much for adding your thoughts!

  • Getting dressed for funerals is tricky, like you said, because style is second to showing respect for who has died and their loved ones. But I’m also like you in that I don’t wear a lot of black, and certainly not head-to-toe. I still want to feel good and feel like myself in what I wear. I notice your look has a lot of textures and small pops of color and embellishment. Those are great tips. I also like the idea of wearing the favorite color of the person who has died if you were close to them. My grandfather loved yellow, so a black dress with a yellow drop earring would be a sweet way to honor him.

    I also think it’s important to have a go-to funeral outfit, already styled. That way you don’t have to think it through on the spot, because who is thinking about their outfit when getting dressed for a funeral, especially if it’s for someone you’re close to?

    Thanks for this thoughtful post, Jodie!

    Liz
    http://www.withwonderandwhimsy.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I do like that idea of having an outfit ready to go. Because that’s the last thing you want to have to stress about!
      And I’d never heard about wearing the colors that the deceased liked before this post. I love that idea and think it speaks volumes for really caring about that person.
      Thanks for your always introspective comments, Liz. You really get me thinking…

  • These outfits are all appropriate and becoming and respectful. I prefer to think of funerals as remembrances of life, so I think your necklace does just that. Great post and thanks for linking, xo

    -Patti
    http://notdeadyetstyle.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I like that thought Patti!
      They are a remembrance of life, and it will happen to all of us. That’s why I feel the need to have a positive perspective on them!

  • There is much to love in this post. Here I go… for one: this blue dress does need an underdress, yes. But if you have added it and put some heels on you will look drop dead gorgeous in it. (I know, we were talking about funerals, but I want to talk outfits for every day first.) The drss shows your great figure without looking “you know what”.
    Nancy’s outfit steals the show too. This ensemble looks soooo good on her. I love everything about it. A great look.
    And Charlotte made very good choices too, looking very elegant. I agree with you that the print blouse is an excellent choice. The art deco brooch is a gem. Just like her I love brooches and I have many. Art deco is my favourite period. Charlotte’s glasses are pretty too.
    Greetje

    • Jodie Filogomo

      This is one of Nancy’s favorites outfits, Greetje. So she will love hearing you say this!! And maybe you’ll laugh, because I’m always trying to split up the “suit” to make it look more modern. Of course she has changed it up here—because it came with a grey shirt!!
      I think I even have a dark, long slip in my possessions—but I never really think to wear it much. Maybe when it’s really cold and I need the warmth. But see—here is the advantage of taking photos of our outfits–now I’ll never forget to wear something under this dress!!
      🙂

      • Of every outfit I make a small photo and add it to my “Outfit Gallery” (top of my navigation). So if I don’t know what to wear, I just go through my gallery. I have more outfits but I started with this half way and couldn’t muster up the courage to put all the outfits in the gallery. Only the other day I was thinking “but what was I wearing underneath that dress? It was something in the same colour, but what was it?” Never found out haha. It wasn’t showing in the photo.

        • Jodie Filogomo

          🙂

  • So glad to see you gals in something other than the traditional black. I know your mom did choose black but with that lively patterned top underneath, the boots and brooch, I think her outfit is less severe and sad while still respectful. Love that you and Nancy chose a little color. I haven’t been to many funerals but for those I have attended, I think the deceased probably would have preferred that people not be gloomy.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I guess I feel the same way Leslie, but it’s funny how others might take a color of clothing as disrespectful. Maybe we use our age as the opportunity to wear different clothing to funerals because people could comment “she’s old and crazy—she wears whatever she wants!”
      Happy Weekend and thanks for the love!

  • Versatilestylebytracey

    I channeled my sister and wore a black dress with black leather jacket and a silver shell necklace she had made. I do tend to wear grey or black. I wore a shrug that was black but had purple butterflies for my Mom’s funeral. I think I will continue to wear back and grey’s as there are so few things in life where we stand with tradition anymore these days and I find it comforting.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Considering how fresh this subject is for you, Tracey, I really want to thank you for joining in on the conversation.
      I can really see how continuing with the traditions could be very comforting for many people.
      I still think about you daily and hope you are doing well. 🙂

  • I enjoyed seeing some different color options and ideas for what to wear to a funeral. I do tend to wear black for these occasions, but will be more open to other colors in the future. Also I think your necklace works just fine for the occasion.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I admit that I usually wear my LBD—pretty much just for funerals. But I’m trying to reconsider my closet lately!!
      Thanks for your thoughts, Jennie!! I really appreciate it!

  • CathyLynchLawdanski

    I love them all. I think Charlotte’s is my favorite. She looks so pretty. And I think I have those same gray pumps that Nancy is wearing. And so true about wearing flats to the burial. I ALWAYS sink into the grass! Such a fun post to do together. Thanks for inviting me to partner with you.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      This really has been more fun doing it with someone else, Cathy!!
      Thanks so much for everything, and maybe I can twist your arm to do another fashion series. The next couple of months, I only brainstormed for 2 varieties for each theme—so it wouldn’t be too hard for you, right? 🙂 And remember—it gets easier with practice!!

  • Kirsten Wick

    This post is so helpful especially because dressing for a funeral can be so hard. Thank you for this! Have a lovely weekend. Kirsten x

    http://www.thelifbissue.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Kirsten.

  • Terri Webster Schrandt

    Like many have already commented, these are tasteful and respectful in their calming shades of blue.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Terri!

  • I love the navy on you and am glad that you went for something other than the cliche black. The lace on your flats is also a nice touch!

    Liz
    http://Www.lizzieinlace.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Liz!

  • Funerals are hard to dress for. I try to stick to darker hues but not black. All of these looks are classic and respectful.

    Jill
    Doused In Pink

    • Jodie Filogomo

      It is funny how most of us do consider them hard to get dressed for—even though fashion is probably the last thing on our mind.
      Thanks for your thoughts, Jill!

  • This is actually such a good topic. Unfortunately, I have wonder too many times what the heck do I wear to this funeral. Great looks!

    Life is just Rosie
    Instagram

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Rosie.
      This is definitely one of those times that you don’t always want to plan out a fun outfit, right? It is nice to have something in mind for the just in case!

  • My father insisted that I didn’t wear Black to his funeral. I ended with a purple suit. I don’t think I will wear Black to my mothers either. You seem to know what your’e all doing here and there are some great style tips. Something no one else talks about, but the reality is that there are most probably alot of women grateful for these tips
    Thank you for linking up to Celebrating Style Jodie. I have shared this post for you xx
    http://www.vanityandmestyle.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Gosh, I love to hear that story, Laurie! I think it’s meaningful if you wear a color that really means something to the deceased!! I feel like I’ve learned so much from posting this because I would never have thought of that!!

  • I think these looks are all classic and timeless perfect for a funeral. I agree, live life to it’s fullest and in the moment! You ladies look great.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Aracely!

  • Raindrops of Sapphire

    I think every one of those outfits are respectful. It’s always hard knowing what to wear as I think it depends on the person who passed away. For my nans funeral, we all wore blue as it was her favourite colour. For my grampy’s, we all chose bright and fun colours as he loved to wear clothes like that. Others we have had to wear grey or black, it really does vary. As long as the pieces are respectful, it’s great. You all look good!

    Raindrops of Sapphire

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I love hearing how you wore the colors that your nan & grampy loved—that is so refreshing and heart warming, Lorna!!
      Thanks so much for sharing this—it makes me realize that there is more than one way to approach this!

  • You all look suitably respectful and elegant. I think under stated jewellery and accessories are fine for a funeral. It’s becoming popular here for people to wear bright colors and make a funeral a celebration of a life, at the deceased’s request. I do it if it’s stipulated but I prefer to wear dark colors. It seems an important part of the grieving process.
    Gail

    • Jodie Filogomo

      That’s interesting to hear Gail about the celebrating. I probably would enjoy that tremendously especially if the person had requested it. I should look into that for my funeral!!
      It makes me wonder if we wouldn’t grieve as much that way?? Because we made it a happy event? Of course we’re sad that they aren’t around anymore, but… I don’t know…
      Thanks for your input–I always love hearing what others think!

  • This can be a tough topic to talk about but one that is so helpful! I think navy is such a great alternative to black. I usually stick to dark tones as well.

    Annessa
    http://www.seekingsunshine.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      This certainly isn’t the funnest outfits to style since it’s such a somber event. But it is practical—so I guess there’s something to be said for that.
      Thanks for stopping by, Annessa!

  • Nicole Mölders

    Thanks for linking up to Top of the World Style

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks for the support, Nicole!!

  • Helen Greenwell

    Although I completely understand avoiding black because it’s not you (After all, Prince Charles were a navy suit to Princess Diana’s funeral) I guess I’m more of a traditionalist here. True, I wear a lot of black anyway and that probably factors into my thought process. However, I think your choice of deep blue dress is very appropriate, very tasteful, and worn without abandoning your own sense of self. Very well done, Jodie!

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Helen.
      I didn’t know that little tidbit about Prince Charles—-very interesting!!

  • I think I like your Mom’s outfit best here maybe for the simple fact that it is the most traditional. I guess I must feel that at it is such a serious somber affair that tradition is what is called for. What do I know? I’ve never been to one.

    bisous
    Suzanne

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Mom will be happy to hear you say this. Because I’m sure when she was growing up, there were many rules to be followed for attending a funeral.
      Maybe I’m just not in the know anymore, but I don’t feel like you hear much about how to dress for it now? Or maybe it’s just who you hang around??

  • donnaduck

    You all look just beautiful in your outfits. You’ve dressed in what I certainly consider appropriate funeral wear, and yet have different colors on. Those are the colors I find myself looking for when I attend a funeral. Almost an office-wear type of apparel. However, I will say that I believe who the deceased is usually has some type of impact on what I wear. If it’s a close relative, and I may be part of the group or “line” that is usually around the casket, I definitely dress nicer. If it’s someone I don’t know as well, I will still dress “nice”, but I may be more casual in what I select. Comfortable shoes are a must, as you said. Spike heels can throw you right over if they get stuck in grass or mud! I also keep in mind where the funeral, and the burial (if I’m attending) will be held. I’ve been to some funeral homes that are so very cold, some burials in the humidity and heat outside, and some churches where I’ve needed a sweater or wrap.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I know exactly what you mean, Donna about the temperatures. We just went to one last year that was outside in December!! Luckily I had my coat and such, but I wasn’t prepared to stand outside for a half hour.

  • Dawn Lucy

    I remember at my mom’s funeral thinking that if I didn’t dress nice she would be so disappointed! She was my fashion buddy! Thanks for linking up, Dear. All of you look wonderful.

    OXOX
    Dawn Lucy
    http://fashionshouldbefun.com/

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Awww…Dawn. How nice she was your fashion buddy. And, of course, she wasn’t disappointed!

  • PetiteOver40

    Thank you for sharing these ideas, Jodie! I haven’t been to a funeral since my grandfather’s passing several years ago and there really have been times I’ve wondered what I would wear when my grandmother passes. At 94, she has her good days and bad days so these thoughts do sometimes come to mind. Your ideas–and your questions about bling and heels, etc.–help me consider what I might already have should the occasion arise.

    I don’t mind the colorful necklace you’re wearing, really. It strikes me that it’s you, your style, and to see you without an accessory with color would be odd. It doesn’t blare out at the world like a Brazilian Carnival parade. It’s simply a lovely piece that expresses you. I would think wearing that–and feeling comfortable in it–would make it easier for you to be present to the family. And that’s why you’re there in the first place.

    Hugs,
    Sherry
    http://www.petiteover40.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I did wonder if it wouldn’t be considered appropriate to have a post like this. Because it’s not like you’re getting dressed to say “look at me”. But it can be such a stressful time if you don’t have anything good to wear for the event.
      I usually wear my LBD to most funerals, but I’m glad to hear that other people wear other colors!
      XOXO

  • So I find funerals hard to dress for. You want to look nice but not too nice. You want to be subdued but not too subdued. Plus, for my Irish family, there is a big party/wake after the funeral so that outfit is going to be worn for a long day of eating and drinking and catching up with relatives. I like Nancy’s outfit best. It looks comfy yet elegant but not too eye-catching. I’m clicking on many of your pretty links too! Julia

    • Jodie Filogomo

      You’ve hit the nail on the head, Julia! You want to look presentable but not like you’re trying too hard!
      So for the Irish–it’s an event, huh? Kinda like a wedding!!

  • Lesley Watson

    I’d wear a pretty scarf in subdued print &/or colors for a funeral instead of the great bling necklace you show Jodie. I went to a funeral in the early fall ( a rainy day however) and wore black slacks & shell with a boyfriend (not sloppy) blazer in a muted mauve. Simple pendant and flats.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      That’s really a great idea, Lesley, with the scarf. I always feel the need to accessorize somehow and a muted scarf would be perfect!
      I love the idea of a mauve too—then it’s not so dark, yet still appropriate!

  • Judy Gramith

    Understated, conservative, and respectful are words that come to mind when planning attire for a funeral. Darker or muted tones of any color and a dressed up (not casual) look is important.
    All of you look perfect.
    Incidentally, I think the same rules apply for an appearance in court. These are life’s serious occasions where “fashion” is not the priority.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Ahhhh…you are so right, Jude. I didn’t even think about the court thing.
      I did wonder about posting this theme because exactly—fashion isn’t the priority. But it is nice to have some ideas in the back of your mind of what you could put together, since funerals do happen, and you don’t usually get a ton of time to plan for it.
      Thanks for chiming in!

  • Nicole Mölders

    In Germany, family wears black. Neighbors, colleagues and friends of the deceased wear black, dark navy blue, dark brown, or charcoal. If you wear a white blouse in must have black stripes, gingham or black polka dots. When a classmate of mine died in high school, the class went to the funeral. All wore black. It was a cold rainy summer day. I didn’t have a black jacket and wore the only one I had which was some burgundy white melange. I got many nasty looks for wearing it from my classmates when we entered the bus to go there. I was thinking of leaving the jacket in the bus. But then decided to keep it on as it was so cold.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks for sharing, Nicole—that is so interesting!!
      I’m glad you kept your jacket because it’s really not your fault that you didn’t have a black one. I’m not sure I had many black clothes when I was younger either!

  • Mireille

    I think you all look appropriate! I have been to my share of funerals the past 10 years and usually try to wear subdued colors. I think that depending whose funeral it is can be a big influence on what is appropriate to wear.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      You bring up a great point, Mireille!!
      If you know the person really well, then it is more appropriate to wear the things that they might have enjoyed instead of always going for the “safe” outfits!!
      Thanks so much for bringing this up—it always gets me thinking of what I’d want at my funeral!!

  • Mummabstylish Mummabstylish

    Like all of these looks especially your mum Charlottes outfit, love your dress and I agree it could be worn to other occasions. Jacqui
    http://www.mummabstylish.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      Thanks Jacqui!! My mom will love to hear you say this!!

  • It’s funny Jodie that I had been planning a “What to wear to a funeral” post and my husband was really against the idea.
    He normally is very “Yeah, okay, whatever you think” but this time he was surprisingly opinionated!
    {Maybe my FIL’s funeral is still too fresh in his mind.}
    Anyway, posts about this topic are useful.
    Especially if people are fortunate not to have been to too many funerals.
    I have seen far too many in recent years.
    Some elderly people but too many still in their prime.
    So sad.
    Life is indeed too short for worrying.
    Life is for living.
    BTW, I would like everyone to wear fabulous shoes at mine!
    XXX

    • Jodie Filogomo

      That’s interesting, Samantha. Because my husband really didn’t like my post about why I like funeral earlier in the week. And I’m the last person to be disrespectful (I think).
      But funerals are a part of our life. And why is it bad to be prepared? Either mentally or physically?
      Maybe you & I should collaborate on a post about what we’d wear to our own funeral—you know, have it be more upbeat and fun??

  • Jean Ann

    Unfortunately this post is perfect timing I have a funeral to attend on Friday and need to put something together. I love Nancy’s outfit and might have a similar set I’ll have to check. My goal is to be stylish but not stand out. Just like weddings I believe attention needs to be on the family not the guests. I was hoping you would put together a post for funerals thanks so much.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I feel like that these events happen more and more as we get older, especially when you have many friends and loved ones.
      You really hit the nail on the head by saying you want to look stylish but not stand out. I have to admit that I wondered if I should even post about this subject. It’s not like the focus is all about what we are wearing. But we do have to get dressed for the event, so it is super helpful to have some ideas on hand.
      I know it’s not a “fun” event, but I hope you can enjoy it in your own way, Jean Ann. And thanks for nice words!! Love ya!

  • Carrie @ Curly Crafty Mom

    I always struggle with what to wear to a funeral… I usually do go the easy route and wear black. I agree, life is way too short and it seems to go faster each year (at least for me!). I just adore that necklace you are wearing and those shoes, too! I really love the material and fit of what Nancy would wear! It looks very soft and comfortable, too…

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I’m glad you said this Carrie. Because I wondered if this was even appropriate for a blog post?
      I realize that the focus isn’t on what we are wearing, yet it is helpful to have ideas in our head, since death is a part of life.
      Thanks for chiming in…I really appreciate it!

  • Laura

    I don’t always wear black to a funeral. I feel that as long as you are dressed modestly and appropriately it should be fine. I like the variety of colors and outfit styles you showed!

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I’m glad to hear you say that Laura! I know as an “old lady” I know what’s been drilled into me for years, so it’s interesting to hear what a younger person like you would consider!!
      Thanks for your voice and happy Thursday!

  • All of the outfits are very appropriate and beautiful. Fortunately, I haven’t had to attend many funerals. And honestly, dressing for one would be a bit of struggle. I will definitely be keeping these outfits in mind.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      It really can be a struggle, Lindsey! That’s why it’s nice to have something already figured out! It’s not always like you get a lot of time to plan for these occasions, and you want to look respectful!!
      I usually reserve my LBD for funeral…but then it’s hard to wear it for fun events because I think of it as my funeral dress. Strange, huh?

  • Great choices, all 🙂 Our usual rule is conservative, subtle, basic.

    For my MIL’s. I almost wore a funky-ish top that had a dark subtle print…but the cut was just a little too funky, so I went with something more “basic”. As a general rule, you can’t go wrong with something that doesn’t call attention to itself.

    Sometimes, though, “the visit” is the more important than the attire. For my FIL’s wake, some of our kids’ friends came from practice, and were wearing practice gear. We were grateful they came, even though they were pretty casual. It meant a lot to all of us. For the funeral though, you have time to pick something appropriate.

    (I’m in no hurry, lol…. but I already know that when it comes time for my dad’s…all rules are out the window…and it will definitely be polka dots. He LOVES them!)

    • Jodie Filogomo

      OMG, Em….that totally made me chuckle about your dad’s funeral time! Especially when it’s a family member–how fun to throw out the rules ! In fact, I should ask my mom what she’d want me to wear—probably something that she’s made me!!
      When I started planning this series, I was thinking about how I could incorporate 3 categories (like I usually do) and the wake was one of them. But in reality, I figured that there wouldn’t be much difference between that and the funeral. Of course it can be more casual, but the basics still apply!!
      Thanks for sharing—-I just love the polka dot idea 🙂

  • Karen

    I really like all of these outfits and think they are appropriate for many occasions. It’s great to have items in the closet that can be used like this. For instance, I can imagine wearing every one of these to work, to church, etc. You all look very polished and put together. I like the “lighter” touches such as Cathy’s jacket, your necklace, Nancy’s blouse (love that!!) and your mom’s brooch and turtleneck. Well done, all of you!! When I attend a funeral or calling hours I generally go with navy, gray, dark green or black, but I have seen family members of the deceased in much lighter clothing and I am always happy to see that. I saw a daughter of the deceased recently in a pink dress and she looked lovely. She said her dad would have wanted it that way and I thought, good for her! Probably lifted her spirits too.

    • Jodie Filogomo

      I love hearing that story about the daughter in a pink dress. I know that many other cultures consider this occasion a time for celebrating and wearing color–which to me is very uplifting!
      I admit that my LBD probably has been worn for more funerals than for “dressy” events, but it’s nice to have other options too!!
      Thanks so much for sharing this Karen, and for being such a great supporter!! Happy Thursday!

      • Charlotte Miller

        Jodie’s Grandma always told her to be sure to wear a dress to her funeral–she was in her nineties when she died and very old-fashioned. She barely allowed herself to wear pants before she died.

        • Jodie Filogomo

          Wow—I don’t even remember this, mom!!
          So did I? Did I wear a dress to grandma’s funeral?

          • Charlotte Miller

            I can’t really remember. I know I did. Remember we three and Joy went back to Toledo for the memorial.